Every single day is a new adventure, every day is a new start. You make your own future, you write your own story but sometimes outside situations make that world that you created come crashing down. I literally have worked so hard to make this picture perfect image that people will be proud of. I am graduating high school a year early, I work two jobs and manage to have a social life as well, along with spending time with family. I can maintain a relationship and still have my own time as well. I can do a lot but its all going to crash eventually, thats how life works, you build up a world of magic and someone makes it tradgic. I cant help but have this sinking feeling that not everything is going to work out how I want it too. I have worked so hard for so long to hold it all together, I have busted my ass to pull of things everyone didnt think that I could do. I have made everything look perfect, even though I am crashing and falling apart inside. I have scared out of my mind that building this fantasy world is going to just be one of those things that slowly disappear and than everyone sees who I am really am and all of my dark secrets. I have done everything to hid my past, I have done everything to keep people out of the dark; it has to stay that way. But when do things ever stay the way you want them too.
I am falling apart and when I finally do just break beyond repair... my perfect world that everyone sees is going to collapse and i wont be here to hold it all together, it will just crumple and than my life will be tanted with regret and loss and lies. I am not sure when this will happen but it will, it always does.
I cant even write this anymore, I am being torn apart but I have to stand strong because my girlfriend needs me right now. buh.
My life, I can't handle it.
-Breaking Suffocation.
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